Cat Scratch Fever

Little known kitty fact: It is AWESOME to stand on your feeder person's head while they sleep.

If he's not in my craw enough the other night he chose to stand - on my head. No no - not the usual walking by to step on my hair for giggles and grins...oh no - this was a full on "Hey beetch, I'm standin on your head!" gesture.

Now I know I have a giant head. But it's not THAT giant. And I also know it's very lumpy. Not a great surface for standing.

I was still groggy and only vaugely aware - that hey, there is a cat standing on my head before he slipped and fell. Not off mind you, just a little slip. According to the kitty fact I stated above - it's so AWESOME to stand on your person's head that you should fight to keep your balance at all costs. Especially using your claws.

His front feet just dug into my scalp. It was the back foot that slid down my eyelid that makes me grab said kitty and fling him off the bed and cry out "You evil fucker!"

I now have a neat thin red line down my right eyelid.

I think this means I get a patch!

It's probably his kitty way of saying "Yo beetch, clip my nails already, or I'll fuckin' cut you!"