Fortune Cookie

A couple of weeks ago I got a fortune from a fortune cookie I really like.

"Your ability to find the silly in the serious will take you far."

For once, my dessert speaks the truth...ok, well I don't know if it's truth - but is definitely how I try to live my life. The overriding rule I try to follow in my life is that you have to laugh, or else you'll cry - and that does no one any good.

Laughter is infectious, in a good way - not like herpes. Humor and laughter strengthen your immune system, boost your energy, diminish pain, and protect you from the damaging effects of stress.

I've had a great teacher in this regard, namely, my dad. The perpetual 10 year-old goofball trapped in a 67 year-old's body, he taught me everything I needed to know about laughter and it's power to heal all ills.

The first time I recall learning this lesson was as a four year old. Our family cat Mowley was hit by a car. Sadly, he wasn't killed. Just crippled enough to drag his poor little broken body back home for us to find him. He was so broken he could only walk backwards. We were all crying, even dad, at our poor kitty and his current condition.  Through the tears my dad pipes up with, "Well this is just great! What are we going to do with a cat that goes, 'woem woem'." Sobs of tears and laughter rose from our little group. It was still an awful situation - but seriously, who does want a cat that says woem?

He even demonstrated his skills within the last week. The thing you have to know in this is that my mother is very Scandinavian, in that, "if I want something done, I am doing it -- RIGHT NOW!" My father's approach is much more laid-back, a sort of "It'll get done, it's all good" vibe.

So my mom had these plants, still in buckets she wanted planted.

"Did you get those plants planted today?"

"No, I'll get to them tomorrow."

"I suppose this will be another one of those things that just never gets done."

Now -- my mom is not trying to be a crab-ass. In her worldview if there is something to be done, it should be done today. There is no tomorrow in her worldview. I admire and loathe that personality trait all at the same time.

My dad pauses for comedic effect, in a dead-pan retorts with, "You're right. I'm such a worthless asshole."

This of course breaks my mother into peals of laughter. My dad is anything but a worthless asshole. She doesn't think he is a worthless asshole, and in this moment, with a little humor, my father has pointed out in the grand scheme of life, the plants can wait one more day - and no one is going to die...not even the plants.

He's broken her. She can't stay mad even if she truly thinks they need to be planted today. A potential squabble is busted up into laughter. Life is good.

This is what I love about my father. This is what I wish to emulate.

(Incidentally we now lovingly refer to my dad is the "good old w.a.")

My dad's other favorite past-time is to start a laugh riot. We were sitting around a campfire during the fourth of July. My sister and her family were here, Gabe and myself, my cousin and his kids, and my mom, dad, and aunt.
The kids were entertaining us with kid jokes, and we chuckled at a few of them.

My cousin's rather soft-spoken middle child Adam offered, "Want to hear the world's dumbest joke?"

"Sure" - we all oblige.

"What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?"

"..."
"Where's my tractor?"

I groaner at best.

But my dad does this thing...it's a fake laugh, but it sounds pretty good. And it builds rather quickly into a hooting cackle of a laugh. It always works, and the rest of us start giggling at the sound of this geezer whooping with laughter at what indeed was possibly the world's dumbest joke. It's now caught fire, our giggles fuel my dad's laugh, which continues, and soon the rest of us are all roaring along with him. Laughing at the laughter at first, but then at the absurdity of our own laughter at nothing, at the situation, the lame joke, and it just kept rolling - a good five minutes of non-stop laughter, that left everyone crying.

Once we all calmed down and caught our breath, my dad punches Adam in the arm and says, "Bet you never got a reaction like that to that joke before"

I don't think anyone in the history of the world has gotten a reaction like that to that joke before. It's his gift, and his favorite game. A game he used to play with his brother Frank as kids when they were bored on the school bus.

"Hey - let's laugh!" one of them would start. And before long the fake "ha ha ha, ho ho, hee hee, ha ha!" would morph into real laughter that would leave them both wheezing messes.

I love this game. I sometimes play it by myself when stuck in really bad traffic.

This goal though - of always trying to find the funny in the serious, I don't think should be mistakenly taken for optimism. I'm not saying find the silver lining in every dark cloud. Sometimes there isn't one. But sometimes when your dark cloud is pouring down rain on you, all you can do is laugh. No point in crying - no one would be able to tell in all that rain anyway. But an idiot laughing in a rainstorm, people notice that kind of thing.

So with that, I am planning on starting a new series of blogs. Hopefully finding the silly in the seriousness that is religion. Namely, the one I was brought up in. Because when you think about it, all religion is pretty funny.

I know that while I find the my silly in that seriousness, it may offend some - and would definitely probably rub my parents the wrong way. They don't find their religion funny at all.

It is not my intention in writing these upcoming blogs to hurt them, or anyone who has a religious affiliation. Rather, this is meant to just be my way of coping. I wouldn't want to hurt my family for the world. Without them, I wouldn't be who I am. But at the same time, I am who I am. And who I am, is no longer a religious person.

I've been inspired of late by some memoirs of loss of faith that I have read l, and while sad - they also have the potential for quite a bit of humor. This coupled with my fortune cookie led me to believe it's time I commit some of this golden material to page. (Web page is a kind of page).

Snacks never lie. It's a sign from the great Keebler Tree in the sky that it is time.

Some of you may be able to relate, because you lived it too, and some of you might just get a "huh, I never knew that" glimpse into the mysterious faith I was raised with, but mostly I hope we all get some chuckles out of it, because at this point I don't feel like crying anymore.