Holy Wow You're Stupid!

I had to go do 20 jumping jacks just now and I may even need to run across the parking lot a few times to burn off my anger at how stupid you are.

You enrolled a student into a program your school doesn't even offer...it's not even like you used to offer it...the program is Cosmetology...you are not a cosmetology school...why? Why did you do this and think this was ok?

Not only did you enroll her for a program you are not accredited to offer, (were you going to let her clip the vet tech animals toe nails?) every step of the process you used to enroll her you got wrong.

You didn't stop when you noticed she was not assigned to your campus.
You didn't stop when you noticed her application says "INFORMATION TECHNOLOGY" you just said - eh...Cosmetology is like IT right?

It's like you looked at the training manual that painfully walks you through every step with screenshots and instead decided to eat it.

You ate it didn't you?

I know you didn't read it, because on page one it would have told you "If the student has a prior enrollment at a different campus submit it to the helpdesk"

But I still know you didn't read it because it's not like you skipped past the first paragraph. You managed to do the opposite of everything you should have done.

When you looked at the enrollment date and saw it was over a year you went ahead and processed it as if it was less than a year. You didn't update anything else but left all the old crap data.

Therefore since you did nothing correct on this student record I feel pretty solid in my conclusion you ate your training manual.

Why?

Why did you eat it? Did you think you imbue it's powers of how to process enrollments correctly by taking it into your system?

If you did eat it, and then culled through your feces in an effort to put it back together so you could read it - I might see how you came to some of the conclusions you did when you processed this student's file.

Now I have to e-mail you. And refrain from asking you if you ate your training manual, and point out to you that literally EVERYTHING you did was wrong. All 7 steps of the process...every one of them WRONG!

The other madding thing about you is - you're not new. You've enrolled lots of people before. Why did you choose to do the exact opposite of everything you've ever done before.

I can only assume you hate me and take this as a personal attack. Because if this was an odds game - odds are you had a 50/50 shot at each of the seven steps of processing this correctly -- since you got 100% of those steps wrong it clearly means you are out to get me.

This means war.

Tonight we dine in hell document eater...