Today's says:
"And the Lord Dog said unto his albino Apostate children, 'Do not be laying thy nakedness bare without first recieving just compensation in form of intoxicating drink, relations befitting a porn star, or plastic baubles of varying colors'. This is what is pleasing to the Lord"
Aposteronomy 6: 6-8
As modern day Apostates it is vital for us to remember these important words when we consider our nudity in public. While flashing, mooning, or even streaking it's important that we do it for the right reasons. Simply getting intoxicated and hanging ones fleshly buttocks out the window of a station wagon is displeasing only if you are not compensated for such a show. Simple personal satisfaction at your deed is selfish and displeasing to the Lord.
The text reminds us what payments are acceptable. More adult beverages, and even food items would be acceptable to take for your baring of flesh. Also sexual favors. This could be anything from a simple one night stand, heavy petting, an intoxicated attempt at oral sex, or even a simple gripping of the exposed body part with an appropriate "honk honk" being given while squeezing said body part. If the person compensating you for your nudity is not attractive, or does not have more alchol it is perfectly acceptable to take plastic spheres in a necklace form, sometimes commonly referred to as "Mardi Gras Beads".
Your body is special and unique. It is perfectly normal to want to show it off to strangers. We must not get carried away however and forget to get something for such a public display. Truely it is a blessing to be able to flash, moon, and streak with our beloved apostate brothers and sisters, let us get the most of it by being compensated accordingly.
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