Oh Internet

Tonight Gabe googled "Why is my dog licking his butt", and thanks to the internet we have diagnosed he probably needs his anal glands expressed.

At this point, I say -- "To the Petsmart, he needs a pedi anyway."

Gabe heads to Youtube.

And that's when I knew the internet had gone too far.

Tutorials on how to express your dogs anal glands. I am not shocked that this exists, just that we live in a modern world where it is possible to have such information in 15 seconds.

Gabe starts to watch, I hover over his shoulder.

"You're going to want to look away."

"Why?"

"It squirts apparently."

-- I can't not look, besides this lady looks like a respectable lady, she has a paper towel, I can guess what's going to happen. I can take it.

The procedure is done. That didn't look too hard.

Then she shows the contents of the paper towel, and I dry heave.

"I TOLD YOU TO LOOK AWAY"

I get the giggles, and turn away. I compose myself and look back over his shoulder and she is going back for round two.

I heave again.

"FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, GET OUT OF HERE!"

I walk out laughing and heaving at the same time, my eyes watering from giggles and vomit reactions, the whole time Kotter wanders between the both of us with a look to say, "Hey guys...guys? What are you guys doing?"

Gabe starts up another video, because this is the internet and there is more than one.

He says, "I think I can do this, it doesn't look that hard."

He turns his monitor away from me and says, "Don't look."

Then he heaves and coughs a little and says. "We're going to Petsmart buddy."